Departure Lounge | Bitrex

Departure Lounge

What’s the toughest part of being a parent? Like the Oscars there are many dramas in contention here.

But one regular moment of supreme tension where stress levels can rival that of an astronaut leaving the earth’s atmosphere is the simple task of getting a couple of under-fives out the door.

At this point in the calendar when the sun sometimes shines, there are longer days but temperature refuses to keep up, the challenges become even greater.

Gloves are nowhere to be seen, scarves disappear to the world of lost scarves; arms refuse to go into jackets; tantrums arrive without warning; the phone rings. And that’s just the toddler. Add a baby into the mix and it becomes an operation that actually seems more challenging than getting someone into space.

Yet it’s something we all do almost every single day. It requires the patience of a yogi, reflexes of a cobra and the limbs of an octopus. Indeed an octopus might call in a helping hand.

And the problem is this is the time when accidents are most likely to happen. When someone trips over the cat, or finds something interesting at the back door. Most accidental poisonings take place when parents are distracted. When there’s most scope for mayhem.

The response is to keep hazardous products tided away whenever they’re not in use and buy products with the Bitrex logo; it’s a safety additive that tastes so bad it’s almost impossible to swallow.

And stay alert. But whatever you do don’t stop going out even if it is like an intergalactic expedition.

Now where’s that left wellie?!